Does changing your last name mean losing your identity once you're married?

on July 19th, after almost 2,350 days of dating - or seven years (most of which have been living together) - I have finally welcomed a new title, 'wife.'

This feat has been a long time coming for my guy. He has proposed to me more than I can count. Although he is amazing, my greatest supporter and best friend, I have just always dismissed the idea due to a very specific set of personal reasons like completing my BA, starting a career and getting out of debt. In other word, I wanted to establish who I was and what made me happy BEFORE I committed to making him happy. I thought that I had to have everything about myself figured out before I was committed to him.

I've always been on the fence about changing my name also. If I googled myself, I get to see the virtual evolution of who I am. I can easily establish myself as a person. However, changing my name would mean erasing all of that. Leaving it all behind. That scared the shit out of me. So i have always said that the man that i decided to marry would have to accept that I would fall into that 13 percent of women who kept their maiden name.

Advise to my HS Self

I submitted an essay for a scholarship today and it was centered around the idea of advise to the younger you. I have written a previous blog post about advise to my future self, which I will happily share here one day. But I've never reflected on what I would tell my younger self.

Here's what I think, in less than 200 words:

If i could speak to my HS self, I would tell her three key words: take your time. You have the rest of your life to rush to fit into a cateogory. Focus on finding out the young person whom you are becoming and falling in love with her. Nothing in the world could ever make you happier than loving the person staring back at you in the mirror.

Be young. Make mistakes. Change paths. Pursue options. Dance, don't just sit and watch everyone else have fun. Just be in the moment. You will never get these moments again and life will happen to you one day. Happen to life today.

You will have the rest of your life to be accountable for the mistakes that you make. So make them wisely now. Regret is something that you so not won't to truly understand the definition of.

My Life List (inspired by Carrots 'n Cake)

There's something magical about FINALLY deciding to take control of your life. It makes you want to scream it through the rooftop,'I finally got my act together!' But what's more important after this realization? Accountability. It's so easy to get wrapped up with the rush that comes along with change that you forget to main the momentum. I tell my friends often that when you find the height of that rush, bottle it up and keep in your back pocket on reserve. You will need it!

I was so inspired by Carrots 'n Cake Life List  and wanted to do one myself. I hope and pray that I can look back a year from today and realize that more than half of this list has been accomplished. I definitely want to expand upon this list in due time. Here we go:

1. Visit Vegas
2. Get married
3. Fly first class
4. Complete a marathon
5. Complete a 14-day cleanse
6. Cut off my hair -again
7. Compete in a figure competition
8. See Beyonce in concert
9. Write a letter to the President
10. Pay off my credit card debt
11. Go to Disneyland
12. Visit three new states
13. Go camping
14. Zipline
15. Spend an entire day with a stranger
16. Earn $120/week as a beachbody Coach
17. Earn $250/week as a beachbody Coach
18. Earn $500/week as a beachbody Coach
19. Pass the NASM CPT Exam
20. Gain 10k views on blog
21. Lose baby weight
22. Get to goal weight of 125lbs
25. Attend a yoga retreat
26. Send Corrie to a major Miami Dolphin's Game
27. Quit my job
28. Get a new tattoo
29. 30 half/full marathons by 30
30. Welcome a healthy baby

This is into a static list and will continue to be edited as I see fit. I'm so excited to get on this journey. I cannot wait to look back 365 days from now and smile because I KNOW that I was working toward my joy.

What's on your list?